Tuesday, September 2, 2008


"Journalist" Amy Goodman (who?) got arrested at the republican convention in Minnetonka.

Huffpost had a freakin' seizure! Finally! Some news out of Minnetonka!


They actually gave a minute by minute rundown of the (tres boring) example of the repressive police state the republicans have fostered. Did I say, bother?

In Denver I saw more police than I saw at the L.A riots! I am not even making this up! I was walking down the street on my way to the GREEN DENVER light rail when out of the blue I noticed some guys running into an office building screaming "shut everything! Get the garages! Everything!" As people began to scream and run from every direction storm troopers surrounded us. I'm talking dressed in black with these really cool helmets and really shiny, obviously brand new toys, big pepper shot guns, 4ft long anarchist beaters and really cute boots. And they were dying to use them.

In a few minutes, all hell broke loose! Between the police rushing the crowds and the horses intimidating people it was sorta frightening (and way cool!).

The police arrested someone in Denver too.

An 80 year old man was thrown to the ground and cuffed as he screamed "I'm not a protester! I was just coming from the library! You guys surrounded me! I got pepper sprayed! Help!"

Huffpost! Where's the outrage! The demands for investigations?

Yes. Where?

Btw, I got pepper sprayed too. Where's my tea and sympathy? Arianna! Help me!

Oh wait. All this happened at the Democratic convention. Any outrage over police state tactics might be seen as , oh, I don't know, OBJECTIVE REPORTING?

I'm so Democratic my white underwear come out of the wash blue. I pray to god and Tip O'neill before I lay me down to sleep. I LOVE JIMMY CARTER FOR CHRISSAKE! Even I see that Huffpost is just looking for ANYTHING to distract from the fact that there is no (negative) story to report from Minnetonka. Oh, sure, there's the white trash baby momma story, but, do liberals dare go there? I gotta a feeling a whole lot of the "white working class" would not take kindly to us libs chasing that dog (though honestly, has any political story EVER cried out for dueling banjos in the background on MSNBC? If I could stand to watch him, I'd love to see what Keith "Dick Morris is banging me right now" Olberman has to stay about all this.).

Let's face it folks. When in comes to the big noise in Minnetonka, there's only silence.

No matter how agitated Huffpost gets.

1 comment:

JACK said...

This is one of my favorites reads today. LMAO at the poor sap on his way to the library. I mean ... awww, poor thing. And now I TOTALLY understand why all my underwear is blue ... who knew.