Wednesday, October 22, 2008


I always ride in the back of the bus. It might be in my black DNA. I don't know. I also love Red Koolaid and sour pickles with a candy cane stuck in the middle (Oh yeah baby, try that for a Kuh-Razee good time) and fried Twinkees (ok, that's white trash but, really, how far apart are the two?).

Once, I was riding down Hollywood blvd when a really ugly Black Drag Queen got on the bus and dragged her suitcase all the way to the back and sat down by the window on the left side (I was by the window on the right). I knew she was homeless, yet, she had a certain grandeur about her. Btw, my great grandmother, the late great Sarah Watts always told me there were no "ugly" people. God created everyone and therefore everyone was "as cute as they could be".

If I ever say your baby is "as cute as he can be" you know I just said you got tricked at the zoo. Just so you know.

I knew Miss Thang could probably use a compliment and then I saw it. Her outfit! She was wearing a black unitard with a mesh black top all topped off with a red sequined vest. She was giving it to you. Serving the children. Giving up fierceness. Taking it to the deacon! Shout! Praise Jes...oh, sorry. I told you I was black. Where was I?

Oh yeah.


So I tells her that I like her outfit and how refreshing it is to see someone make an effort. She beamed and told me how she loved fashion and always made it a point to do her best. We smiled and I went back to looking out the window at Hollywood blvd.

I always hate the stop at Hollywood and Highland. If any trouble is going to get on the bus that's where it happened. As we waited to leave the stop I sensed trouble.

When you sense trouble, trouble is there.

These Black (I mention color because if I said the following you would assume they were black and then you would be a racist. I'm just trying to save you some liberal guilt) gangbangers were standing staring at the bus in a really menacing way. I finally realized they were staring at my new friend. We were stuck at the stop because of all the traffic and I was praying we could get out of there. The back door was open and the screaming began. "You ugly bitch!". "Faggot!". "Nasty Ho!". My heart went out to her. She looked straight ahead but kept one eye on them.

All of a sudden one of the girls in the group and her (really dyke-y looking friend) jumped on the bus and came at her. They hit her.


That big bitch grabbed hold of the meanest one and proceeded to give that bitch the holy ghost. Her Dyke-y friend took the fuck off and let Lil Kim take her beat down all alone. So much for having yo gurls back. Kim starts screaming for the driver to help her. The whole bus had witnessed the beginning of the whole thing when La Grandeura was just minding her own business, so, no one was inclined to help her.

Including the bus driver!

Tee. Hee.

People. At the end of the day no matter what you think of trannies, they are men! In this case a big black "cute as he could be" MAN. A man who has spent all day (and most of his life) taking shit from anyone who wanted to dish it out. She's homeless and lugging around a suitcase and her baggage.

Of course she's going to beat somebody down at some point. It's called, THE BOILING POINT.

Finally Lil Kim escaped her clutches and made for the door. The bus erupted into cheers! Big raucous cheers! Straight. Gay. Black. Mexican. THE BUS DRIVER! Cheers!

Miss Thang sat down and I looked at her and she said, "I'm tired."

She got off at the next stop. Right before she got off she looked at me and said with a really sweet smile, "thank you."

I wish she would have been visiting the home of Milton Lindgren, 70, and Eric Hendricks, 73 of Indianopolis recently.

The two elderly men were brutally murdered in their home after enduring constant harassment from god only knows who for being gay.

Someone. Some fucking asshole coward bludgeoned them to death. Hendricks was in a wheelchair for fucks sake. Someone killed these guys.

For no reason.

At all.

The neighbors said it was obvious that they were killed for being gay. The straight neighbors. The police say they are investigating to see if it was a hate crime.

I don't care what you want to call it. It was stupid.

What is about us humans that we can't just let other people live their lives?

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