Friday, August 29, 2008


Let's face it. John McCain is a bigger threat than the media want to let on to.

I have said for months that John McCain has one majr thing going for him. He doesn't bother people.

George Bush bothers people. Hillary Clinton bothers people. Barack Obama bothers people. John McCain doesn't bother people.

McCain is like that uncle who you only see ever so often at family gatherings who, even though you don't agree with him, you still sorta want to sit next to outside at the picnic table and chew the fat with. He's always got a good story about the war and he's nice to your boyfriend (even if you're gay.). He'll probably goad you into a game of horseshoes (that he'll win.) and will drink you under the table while flirting with the single widows in a way that doesn't make Stepfordsheera mad ( I hope this isn't sexist , or whatever, but Cindy McCain looks like a Stepford wife waiting on the afternoon bell so she can wash her "pill" down with a boiler maker or six.).

Hillary and Barack? Not so much. Hillary would bore you with a 2 hour dissertation on the policy behind making chocolate chip cookies and Barack would piss you off because you know your mom is going to spend the entire time in the wagon on the way home asking, "why can't you be more like him?". As you stare out the window hating life, Johhny boy will speed by in his latelife Corvette, top down, listening to Willie Nelson remixes with Stepfordsheera smiling blankly.

Well, let's face it. A whole lot of Americans will vote for the one who "really doesn't bother me."

Today, Old Wrinkly Guy, irregardless of what you think ( how much do I love that total non-word) of him, did something that just gave a lot of fence sitters a reason to excuse themselves in the voting booth.

WhiteHaired Guy today picked Alaska Governor Sarah "The Barrucuda" Palin, a 44 year old, conservative "hockey mom to be his Vice Presidential Running mate.

Ok, look, no matter what you think of Old Dude, this was a brill political move.
1: It takes alot of the attention away from last nights amazing stadium filling Obama acceptance speech (this town was like Beyonce "Crazy In Love" last night.).
2: The choice will occupy the MSM ( ok, after this election this is one of those dumbass phrases that must be eliminated.) all weekend as opposed to being all Obama/Democrat all the time.
3: She actually might give a Hillary supporter who really didn't want to make a change an excuse to vote for McCain.
4: Her reputation seems to be pretty above board. The only major negative I see is that she supports drilling in Alaska (as do most Alaskans, they get a check every year from oil.). Obviously as a gay guy who believes in a womans' right to choose what to do with her body she would never work for me, however, on that issue and many others conservatives hold dear, she's exactly what they wanted.
5: She's busting corrupt men like that soon to be somebody's really old bitch, Ted Stevens. Corruption busting has been her stock in trade in the great North. So, if you're looking for additional cover to vote for her you can claim she's not soft on crime (of course neither is Joe Biden, but he's got a penis.).

As Wednesday Adams once said, "be afraid, be very afraid."

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