Wednesday, December 31, 2008

CAROLINE KENNEDY FOR SENATE. OR YO! HILLARY GET OVER HERE FOR ONE MORE BITCH SLAP!


The Lakes is a decidedly upscale community behind gates in The LV.

I once did drugs there. Or was that Canyon Gate?

There were gates. Whatever.

Well, after I stepped up and drank the Koolaid after my days as a Hillary Girl I decided to do my part and throw a debate watching party.

Which debate?

Bitch please. I'm gay.

I hosted the Biden vs Palin throwdown.

As if.

I hosted it at the home of LV legend Stephen Sorrentino and his REALLY HAWT BF, Hot Latin Guy. Don't get me wrong, Stephen is a piece of Eyetalian Salami himself, but when setting the table, never put the shrimp next to the salad.

Just saying, HLBF is hawt!

So.

I stood outside at said gates because the promised volunteers from That One never showed up. No problem, my outfit was cute and I made everyone buy raffle tickets to help the homeless.

But. I stood at the gates and took so much shit from every fake tittied, drunken, repressed second wife The Lakes had to offer.

"Who are you? I can ask because I PAY A LOT OF MONEY TO LIVE HERE!"

Yeah and your husband is fucking someone else.

Maybe me. If you say one more word to me in that TONE.

My point?

All through the primaries and election all you ever heard was how That One and his team didn't make mistakes.

Well.

As soon as he got elected, That One started showing that even The Holiest of All Holiest is fallible.

Quite.

First, there's the whole issue of inviting Anti-Semitic Homophobe "Pastor" Rick Warren to give the immolation at the inauguration.

Or some such.

And now. Just in case Hillary Clinton doesn't understand that she is to work whatever corner she is assigned on the stroll, along comes Caroline Kennedy.

You know CK.

She comes from a long line of criminals and rapists.

Did I forget murderers? Oh, well, I guess leaving Mary Jo Kopechne at the bottom of the bay while you went to meet with your people isn't EXACTLY murder.

Exactly.

She also committed the unforgivable sin of turning her back on The Clintons and very publicly supporting That One during the primaries.

Remember the primaries.

Won't you?

That was a period when certain hypocrites from the great state of Chowderheads decided that Superdelegates should vote the will of their people.

Until, of course, the will of the Chowderheads went in favor of Hillary Clinton.

At that point.

Huh?

Oh?

Remember Superdelegates?

No gay fag guys. SUPER DE LA GATES! Not SUP ER MOD ELS!

LINDA!

NAOMI!

Oops.

Sorry.

Anyway.

That one and his band of The Obviously Newly Insane decided that C of the Chowderhead Gangsta Murdering Rapist K's should take over the Senate seat of Hillary Rodham Clinton.

WTF?

Why don't you have Benedict Arnold take over the Continental Army? Or Bill Richardson, oh wait, fuck that fat hairy "I am Mexican, it's convenient now isn't it?".

I digress.

18 million people would get Bitch slapped majorous if C to the K was chosen, nay, anointed to replace Hillary.

I put up with that Rick Warren bullshit.

I even put up with Janice Dickenson referring to herself as The First Supermodel.

LINDA!

NAOMI!

Janice? Bitch please.

Original Super Coke Head. Super Skank. Super "are you my baby daddy?".

Maybe.

Supermodel?

So, let me just say if Miss I forgot to vote, I never gave money to support local Democrats, I really can't be bothered to speak with the press, oh wait, I need to stab Hillary Clinton in the back is chosen to take over the hard won seat of HRC, That One better understand the Tsunami coming is aiming for him.

How many days before the immolation?

Or whatever.

4 comments:

Craig Curtis said...

Janice Dickerson should be the "first" supermodel senator! She is far more qualified for that seat (I bet she thinks so) than CK. Hell, Alyson Jablonski (she of the "let's make Craig Thespian President instead of Herb Nagel because Fleta Grey said so, even though the vote was for Herb...remember how she regretted THAT move?) is more qualified. Yeah, CK has the pedigree, but so do Paris Hilton's cast-off miniature dogs! It's a baaad move.

Thanks for the fun story. It DOES take a while for you to get to the point, but as ever, it's entertaining.

dwashington314@gmail.com said...

I actually am fond of Paris' leetle dog.

Vtknitboy said...

where should i start?! sigh. just to let you know, i'm NOT on the C to the K band wagon. i NEVAH think one should be anointed just becuz of one's pedigree or name.

oh, it's chowDAHhead! (or, chowda'head) ;) luv ya!

oooh! my word verification was upeat!

THE VEGAS STYLE GUY said...

I stand corrected, "Chow Da Head"! lol