HOW I GOT INVITED TO THE DADT REPEAL SIGNING CEREMONY, OR, ROBIN MCGEHEE MADE ME FAT!

Many moons ago, I was a svelte-ish radio show co-host and Gay guy who mixed Plaids & Florals and dared anyone to question it.

Many. Moons. Ago.

Then one day as if he had the most innocuous statement to make, Christopher Allen Miller (he HATES that. Tee. Hee.) says to me, he says, "we should do an interview with this Lesbian from Fresno who is really pissed off and having a rally."

Lesbian. Pissed off. FRESNO. Rally.

Really.

I swear.

Needless to say, all I could imagine was short weeble like angry women who insist on use using gender neutral pronouns whilst telling me how the first Lillith Fair was the best.

As if.

So.

I took a look at my fave blog, Towleroad, and saw instead a cute Blonde chick with a sexy, husky voice. She gave a speech about how she was thrown off her kids PTA because she was openly Gay.

"I wanna tell ya all a story 'bout a Harper Valley Widowed Wife..."

Sorry. I'm so Gay.

Anyway.

We interview her and before I know it, Chris and I are sucked up into helping plan the National Equality March and I'm fighting with Cleve Jones over diversity and inclusion.

Never meet other people's hero's.

THEN.

Somehow.

I end up involved in Stonewall and I drag everyone I know into it with me.

Oh. Wait.

Along the way I introduced Senator Harry Reid to Dan Choi and he told us that he and the President were going to end DADT.

Ooops. Little detail.

So.

Harry goes up against the nutjob of all nutjobs. We work our asses off to get him elected and he keeps his promise and my bestest buddy at the White House (I never know if I can say his name) invites me to the DADT signing ceremony which NEVADA played a huge part in making happen.

I know. I know.

HOW DID ROBIN MCGEHEE MAKE ME FAT?

Because.

When you complain to Robin about something, she say, "fix it."

WELL.

For two years I have been sitting at a computer eating bacon wrapped bon bons, going to every political event to get Harry Reid elected, drank more cocktails than a Singapore Hooker (oops, "SEX WORKER") and eaten enough pizza to have once actually pinched out a large pepperoni and cheese!

Thanks a lot Robin McGeHee!